Big Book reading mistakes:

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our loves had become unmanageable.

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmentionable.

Sought through prayer and medication...

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong probably admitted it.

What? An order?? I can't go through with it!!!

We will comprehend the word cemetery and we will know peace.

Other Funnies

Sobriety is the leading cause of relapse.

A treatment center is where you go and pay $15,000 to find out that A. A. meetings are free.

This is a 'One Day at a Time' program. If you are clean and sober today, you are tied for first place in A. A.

If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker.
If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

I often obsessively pursue feeling matter how bad it makes me feel.

When I was new, I didn't think I had any obsessions until I started thinking about it. Then it was all I could think about.

How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?

It's not old behavior if I'm still doing it.

If you want to quit drinking, you are going to have to quit drinking.

Newcomer: "How do I know how many meetings I should attend each week?"
Old-timer: "Gradually cut back until you drink. Then you'll know."

If you're looking to have an image in A. A., look around at the meetings you go to and take a look at who you're trying to impress.

I would rather go through life sober, believing I am an alcoholic, than go through life drunk, trying to convince myself that I am not.

An alcoholic is a person who wants to be held while he's isolating.

Resentments are like stray cats: if you don't feed them, they'll go away.

In California we call them babies cause they are like babes in the woods; in New York they call them pigeons cause they are sure to shit on you!

The difference between a problem drinker and an Alcoholic is that:
A) When the alcohol is taken away from the problem drinker, the problem goes away.
B) When the alcohol is taken away from the Alcoholic, the problem begins.

Baby: "When will I get a good job?"
Sponsor: "When you are ready."
Baby: "How will I know I am ready?"
Sponsor: "You'll have a good job."

If I am not the problem, then there is no solution.

Before I came into AA, I was dead, but I did not know enough to lay down.

It is the great obsession of every Al-Anon, that someday he or she will learn to control and enjoy their drinker.

You don't have to be sick to want to get well. But if you don't want to get well, you ARE sick.

I can't do His will my way.

In order to change the way we feel we need to change the way we act.

There is only one way to coast, and that is down hill.

The good news is you get your emotions back; The bad news is you get your emotions back.

Don't be a pigeon. If you tie a message to a pigeon's foot and send him to Denver, the guy in Denver will get the message ... but the pigeon won't.

I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still possess.

Without memory, there is no healing. Without forgiveness, there is no future.

Never let the disease beguile you into thinking: It wasn't that bad.

A broken brain can't fix a broken brain.

I try to take 1 day at a time but sometimes several days attack me at once.

It's not old behavior if you're still doing it.

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